I think my action always falls into one of three categories, at least as a dominant descriptor. So I am always either surviving, relating, or creating.
,When I walk on the road, I am in surviving mode, especially watching out for oncoming traffic, potholes and pits, garbage dumps and dogs.
Of course, at that time, if I am walking with a friend, especially someone I like very much and whose company I don't get much of, I am relating to him/her first and foremost. Then only comes surviving the travails of walking on the road.
When I am at a party, I am mostly relating. If I am called to introduce my friend to the audience, I go into the creating mode. I am not implying that I am making up tales, but that I am verbalising and communicating to the audience in a way that best describes my friend and our friendship, and there is an element of creativity in it.
So I am always primarily in one of three modes. But consciously, I am choosing my mode because I am actually experiencing "being". In other words, I can do any of these three only when I am consciously being.
What if I am thoughtlessly acting, sleepily passing time, and actually mindlessly moving about? Either by choice or by a kind of mental inertia, I am then choosing to be not in the "being" mode. Then this discussion is actually irrelevant.
As I grow and evolve, I start becoming better at each of these three actions, by a kind of conscious effort. I survive illness, hardship, emotional turmoil, and environmental challenges, better. I relate to people better, by being more centred in them and their welfare. I go beyond my immediate selfish ends and think and act for a larger social purpose.
I create better, too. I get trained, or become more efficient in doing what I like, as a creator.
I start enjoying in the next stage my being, in its essence, with an innate sense of well-being. My need to defend against perceived or non-existent threats goes down. I can relate even to strangers, and become a more vibrant, positive, member of the social circle. People start enjoying my company. It seems that my being is enriched by my relating.
Similarly, when I rest after joyfully creating something, it is less of an ego-trip and more of a sense of being a part of a beautiful whole.
Do you see where I come from?
In the next post, I will talk about my choices, aspirations, and even prayers in these three modes.
